I look at my blog like a journal. I do enjoy knowing that my close friends and family can see how we are doing, but this is one of those posts that you may not want to read. But I feel like that I need to journal what I'm going through and how I feel. I don't just want to journal about the good things in my life. I've a really good attitude about our stressful situation for a long time now, but this post is far from that.